Liberated Misogyny- Joe Carter on Sex and the City

I have often asked the question, "What has thirty years of feminist liberation really given us?" There is more misogyny, divorce, child abuse, sexual confusion, std's, domestic violence, and general unrest between the sexes than ever before. I'm no utilitarian, and I believe that the aims of gender feminism (and that odd bird we call evangelical feminism) can easily be dismissed on purely philosophical, theological, and biblical grounds. But we can at least say that pragmatically the movement is a bit of a wash.

Joe Carter over at the evangelical outpost provides us with a helpful examination of that towering pop cultural totem to liberated femininity called Sex and the City. Check it out.

Open Disdain for the Home

The Bayly bros. have a post drawing our attention to the open hostility towards the vocation of homemaking from the Center for Biblical Equality. I encourage you to read Tim's post as well as the very unChristlike and unBiblical piece over at CBE.

Let me quote Scripture again on this issue:

1 Timothy 5:14 So I counsel younger widows to marry, to have children, to manage their homes and to give the enemy no opportunity for slander.

Titus 2:3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4 Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.

I have a post here that defends the godly and biblical priority of building and working in the home for wives and mothers. I will not go into great detail here as to the various arguments that present exceptions to the general rule of Scripture on this point (such as single motherhood, extraordinary financial situations, various 'ministry' oriented vocations outside the home, working outside the home in different seasons of life, etc.). It is one thing to argue for the validity of working outside the home, it is quite another to mock and disdain those who do (with strong biblical warrant for their choice, which cannot necessarily be said for those who choose vocation outside the home at the expense of childrearing).

Workers of the Home

I was invited to teach on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood to one of our women's bible studies last week. It was a rather broad and sweeping look at the biblical and theological importance of the whole topic, so I labored long as I often try to do on this rather 'touchy' issue to establish the fundamental principles that we may gather from Scripture. It is then important to set them in their proper theological framework, and then try and make some more 'practical' applications within our contemporary and personal contexts.

Here is a summary statement of the broad testimony of Scripture to Manhood and Womanhood:
God made man male and female in his image. As such, men and women are equal as image bearers. Though equal in essence, or 'ontology' (being), they are nonetheless distinctly different in a variety of ways. These differences, reaching beyond biology and physiology, are God ordained and good. With such 'functional' differences, men and women are the natural and necessary compliments of one another. These functional differences call men to lead and serve as 'heads' of their homes, churches, and even in society at large. The functional differences call women to submit to the biblical headship of their husbands, pastors, and leaders in society. These differences display the glory of God as Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. These differences display the glorious and mysterious relationship of Christ the bridegroom and His Church the bride.

Some questions of practical application might be:
What does headship and submission look like on a daily level?
What do we do with abuses of headship? What do we do with the neglect of submission?
What about societal and cultural moves toward an increasingly secular and egalitarian framework for all of life and its implications in the life of the believer and a believing family (from girls wrestling boys at our local high school, to women serving in the armed forces, to the question of women leading the country- which is fast approaching with the real possibility of a female speaker and a female president)?

All good questions. And those who have any biblical and spiritual fortitude should step up and try to answer them honestly. The answers are not inconsequential. Sadly, biblical fortitude is a commodity in scarce supply these days.

The question I often get has to do with women working outside the home. Can or should a woman with children (or without children even) work outside the home? The question, lest you think me a chauvinist dinosaur, finds its impetus in Scripture:

1 Timothy 5:14 So I counsel younger widows to marry, to have children, to manage their homes and to give the enemy no opportunity for slander.
Titus 2:3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4 Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.

I believe there is room to be biblically faithful to godly womanhood presented in these exhortations in a variety of ways in the given context of your life. I try to counsel folks asking the above question by presenting the principles and biblical foundation, so that each can form godly convictions and apply them rightly in their unique situation. Each one of us will stand before the Lord and answer to Him as stewards of his . I won't answer for you, and you will not answer for me. I think that it is safe to say that many of our decisions surrounding these issues are driven more by worldly concerns and personal desires than by the convictions we have formed based on Scripture.

I'd like to lay down some basic principles that seem to be at the heart of the matter in these letters and throughout the Scriptural call to biblical womanhood. First, let me make an important preliminary point.

Both of these verses are found in what are commonly referred to as the 'pastoral epistles'. The context of these letters are from the Apostle Paul to two young pastors dealing with the struggles, concerns, and issues that face the church (Timothy in Ephesus and Titus in Crete). It simply will not do to write off these passages as 'cultural' and therefore not applicable today. This sort of answer to the 'problem' (as some see it) of Paul's rather archaic notion of good housekeeping is a rather torturous hermeneutic, and I see it thrown around willy nilly on this issue. There are two passages in the NT that Paul calls Timothy to directly exhort women in the church- the widows, and of course, single women are exhorted to marry and 'work in the home'. The older women are to give themselves to teaching and discipling the younger women to be 'rulers' or 'managers' of the home. We must mark well that nowhere in these crucial letters (or in the New Testament) does Paul call women to work outside the home, to pursue vocation outside the home, to find an 'identity' outside the home. He could have done this. It was culturally acceptable in both Ephesus and Crete for women, especially Greek and Roman women, to pursue a 'life' outside the home. But, in fact, Paul does not exhort them to pursue a vocation outside the home, nor does he exhort them regarding how they should labor outside the home if indeed pursue this. It is reasonable to think that his exhortations are rooted in the reality that women were indeed forsaking the home for some other area of labor, ministry, or perhaps just laziness. He explicitly calls women to the care of the home. I have heard more than once someone say rather accusingly, "Pastor Erik, you don't believe a woman should work outside the home." That may or may not be true (for the most part, especially where young children are in the home, or where there are not significant financial exigencies, it is true). The question is of not fundamental importance if I believe this or that (of course in a secondary sense it is important, me being a pastor and all). Of fundamental importance is whether you believe this or that, and whether or not that belief is founded on God's Word.

Here are some basic principles that we might glean from these passages, in the broader context of the whole of Scripture dealing with biblical manhood and womanhood:

1. These passages establish that the 'home' is crucial.

The home is a place that needs labor and care so that it provides a healthy arena for godly marriages, the proper nurture of children, and the work of ministry.. We live in a culture that is calling us all - men, women, and children - away from the home and into the world. God saw the 'home' as a place so vitally important that there should be one giving a 'full time' vocational interest in its maintenance and order. I am taking 'home' to mean more than the physical structure, or 'house'. The 'home' is the laboratory of health and development of so many aspects of our lives, especially for our little ones. The exhortation, you'll observe, is to the younger women, those who have the needs of children before them, or those who should be considering the blessing of children and family.

2. The vocation of 'home making' is noble.

The work and management of the home is a lofty and high calling. The nurture of chidren in the context of a believing home is of inestimable value to the kingdom of God and the blessing of culture and society. We should be careful not to denigrate this calling and duty as ignoble, not worthwhile, or demeaning. Recently a young woman told me that she doesn't want to just have babies, change diapers, and make dinner for a husband. I hear this sentiment a lot. I often try to graciously point out how grateful I am that my mother carried me for nine months and did not abort me, changed my diapers and did not let me sit in poop and pee all day long, and made the dinner table a place of good food, good fellowship, and love rather than a fast food drive-thru. As lowly and mundane as these duties may seem from our perspective, the care and grace of a mother in the doing of them is so important to our little ones and our homes.

3. The home and its work should be a priority for both men and women.

It should be a priority for men as they work hard to provide for the financial and material needs of the home. It should be a priority for men as they balance the demands of their work in provision with the emotional and spiritual needs of their wives and children that is also their calling to provide. So, do not forsake the material needs of the home- work hard and pay the mortgage. Do not forsake the spiritual needs of the home- work hard, but come home and wrestle with the kids, (and, of course, wrestle with your wife later on in the evening- can I get an Amen?), lead devotions at the table, and do the dishes . This is a hard line to walk. But, men, walk it we must.

It should be a priority for women as they receive the unique gifting and calling of God to bear and nurture children. God created women with the ability to bear children. Women are uniquely gifted to nurture children in those most crucial stages of childhood development (the natural ability that Tori has to soothe and feed our babies from her own body is a gift of God to our children and to her). In these passages it is the women who are called to be 'workers' and 'managers' of the home, not the men. This is worth noting. This vocation is given by God to women, naturally through childbirth, early nurturing, and general inclinations to care giving that seem to be 'hard wired' into women by God. The reversal of this calling- from women to men, which is increasingly common today, is generally not healthy for children, is generally not natural to biblical masculinity, and finds little to no warrant in Scripture.

[Another more distinctly theological argument may be made which would assert that to reverse these roles in the home is also a refusal to deal redemptively and faithfully with the curse of the fall (cf. Genesis 3:16-19). Pain and abor outside the home - in the field in the ancient near eastern context, in the office in our contemporary context- is part of the curse that MEN bear. Pain and labor in childbirth and in the raising of children is part of the curse that WOMEN bear. We must be careful not to shirk our responsibilities in these areas and so refuse the blessing that God brings in our faithfulness to His redemptive plan as we bear the burden of the curse. In many homes we have infinite frustration as two partners bear the burden of the curse upon men- while our children languish as no one bears the curse that would bring them blessing. This could take more fleshing out, but I'll leave it at that for now.]

4. The home is the domain of the woman.

The passage in Titus 2 says that the woman should be the the 'oikourgous'- the worker of the home. The passage in 1 Timothy 5 says that the woman is to be the 'oikodespotein'- the ruler of the house. A great picture in Scripture of the woman who 'rules her house' is in Proverbs 31:10-31. The 'home making' enterprise may reach, in fact should reach, much farther than the walls of her house. It is an entrepeneurial enterprise. It takes great wisdom, skill, grace, care, strength, and love. Proverbs 31, along with these passages of the Pastoral Epistles, reveal that the woman is divinely called to this labor, and the women of God in the church should be laboring to call, equip, and encourage other women in this vocation of 'seeing well to the needs of her home'. The wise husband, though bearing ultimately the responsibility for his family, marriage, his children, and his home, will charge his wife to take control of the home, and move aside so she may do it. Tori runs our budget, she gives me 'honey-do' lists, fixes the calendar of our family life, keeps me accountable in the spiritual duties I bear in our family and marriage. I gladly surrender this domain to her and marvel at her manifold gifts, talents, and hard work in accepting the call.

5. The home and its life is of critical importance to the Church and its life.

It is a dangerous thing for a pastor to meddle in such things. I write all this with fear and trembling. I know that many will be angry with me and think me a fool. I know that there are many folks who struggle with these decisions with great anxiety and pain due to the nature of their circumstances. I know that for many to take heed to these passages would mean to change the whole trajectory of their plans and dreams regarding their lives. I know that these aren't 'black and white' issues. There is a good bit of grey here. What about single women? What about married women without children? What about single moms? What about families with great financial burdens that need two incomes to survive? What about women with grown children?
I believe that there are answers to such questions. But they must be answered in the context of careful study of the Word, with wise and experienced counsel, with prayer and petitions, and with great caution and care. The Apostle sees these issues as important enough to exhort Pastor Timothy and Pastor Titus to get into it with their people.

Why is this? Because the health of the church is wrapped up in the health of the home. Paul is very concerned with the home life of the leaders of the church over in 1 Timothy 3 and Titus 1. The decisions, labors, and care of a man in his home will be indicative of the decisions, labors and care of a man in his church, 'the family of God' (1 Timothy 3:4-5). In the New Testament, the home and the family are the main sphere of ministry and outreach. The local churches met in homes (Rom.16:5;1 Cor. 16:19;Col.4:15;Phile 1:2). The bulk of pastoral care and teaching was from 'home to home' (Acts 2:46-47; 20:20). The attack of Satan would come as false teachers proceed from 'home to home' (2 Tim. 3:6-7; Acts 8:3). As the home is the cornerstone of any healthy society, so is the spiritual health of the home the cornerstone of the spiritual health of the church.

We cannot ignore the immense secular forces at work in our culture today that are challenging the biblical call to build healthy and godly marriages, families, and churches. These forces are by and large calling men and women to the altars of personal reputation, vocational identity, opulence, comfort, and power. There is a push toward a secular, radical feminism on many fronts in our culture- our homes, our schools, the workplace, and sadly the church. The sacrifices we must offer up to the gods of this age are often those things that God's Word calls us to pursue and press toward for His glory and our good. There is a duty of pastors, elders, godly older women, and the whole assembly of God's people to fight the impulses and forces of the age and continually return to the standard of God's Word. Let's fight that fleshly, worldly, and dare I say, Satanic desire to ask, "Hath God really said?" and rather embrace the design of God for our marriages, our homes, our churches, and our very lives.

Soli Deo Gloria

The Wisdom of Starbucks

I know, I know, I am a total corporate sell out. But the coffee is so good!

So, I'm sitting on a date with Tori and I glance at the cup in my hand (venti extra shot americano with vanilla). The Starbucks gods make our caffeine charged outing an evening of social enlightenment by putting little nuggets of wisdom from this or that muckity muck on the side of the cup. (I hear the inimitable Rev. Warren even got a blurb. Yes, yes, I've sent one in and it is in production. Patience, dear ones.)

Here's the one that brought us some precious awareness last night:


"According to the Federal Reserve Bank, $1 spent on excellent preschool education saves $7 in special education, social service and future incarceration costs more than a dozen years later. Are we, as citizens, willing to elect government leaders who spend our taxes on something that offers a return so far in the future? I hope so."

-- Rob Waldron
President and CEO of Jumpstart, a national nonprofit early education organization.

Let's think about this for a moment. What is 'preschool education'? This used to be called 'daycare'. And, government sponsored babysitting certainly doesn't have the same ring. Oh well, whatever helps us get through the night.

You know what we need to learn to do these days? We need to ask the right questions. The ones that Mr. Waldron and the Starbucks propagandists don't want you to ask. Questions that can't be quantified with such powerful, albeit crudely utilitarian, statistics as provided by the Federal Reserve Bank.

Questions like:

What is happening to our little ones that we must provide this 'preschool education'?
What cruel forces are at work conspiring against our 3 mos - 4 year olds today that would necessitate such 'special education', 'social service', and 'future incarceration'?
Why is it that when we hear of such grievous ills facing our children 12 years down the road, we somehow feel better that big brother is throwing our tax dollars at the problem while we enjoy our $5 latte?
Where are the mothers of these little ones?
Where are their fathers?
Where are their pastors?
What is happening in our culture that our babies are abandoned, only to be swooped up by the loving arms of government funded, state sponsored daycare?
Why do we deem such remedies as acceptable, laudable, or even preferrable to the God ordained relationships built into human society to nurture and care for children?
If $1 today keeps them out of jail in twelve years, how many dollars would it take to make them whole, balanced, loved, confident, learned, aware, joyful, and hopeful?

I didn't say I had all the answers.

I just wanted to make sure that we keep asking some of the right questions.

In Loving Submission. . .

I had an interesting ‘pastoral’ experience last week that I just had to blog about. I will be marrying a young couple in our fellowship this coming May (actually, on May 20, which happens to be Tori’s and my 11th anniversary!). The bride is from another town where she grew up in a United Methodist Church. In order to honor her family and her upbringing in this church, the plan was to use their sanctuary for the service while having me preside over the ceremony. Some weeks ago the pastor of this Methodist church informed the bride to be that he was concerned about the order of service that I might use and that he might need to check out the wording of the service. He was especially concerned that there would be a distinction made in the vows, charge to the couple, etc. of male and female roles in marriage. I sent him the wording of the service I would be generally following. In the bride’s vows to the groom she is to say, “And I promise to honor you in loving submission” (the groom says to the bride, “And I promise to love you as Christ loves the Church”).

As you may have predicted, the pastor emailed me stating that he could not allow the term ‘submission’ to be used in a wedding service in his church with many of his congregants present as it reflected a position regarding marriage and gender that differed from his own and that of his denomination. I replied that, while I respect his authority over his congregation and his desire to guard the teaching that comes from his pulpit, I was constrained before God to call those under my charge (specifically, the bride and groom; generally, all those who hear me preach and teach regardless of who their pastor is or where they go to church, or in what building I happen to be in) to obey God’s Word. I told him that I most certainly would not remove the word ‘submission’ from the vows, nor would I ignore the clear teaching of Scripture regarding the role distinctions between the sexes during a service of worship to God celebrating the gift of marriage. We traded emails back and forth and I was gently beseeched to supplant one word or another for ‘submission’. I told him that the word ‘submission’ is a very important word, because it is the word that the Spirit of God has given us (repeatedly) to describe the relationship and duty of a wife toward her husband. Just as it was important to him that this word be removed, I saw it as critically important that this word remain. See, words are important, no matter what our postmodern theologians keep telling us!

Well, all of this was very unsettling for the poor bride and groom to be. Plans had been made, invitations had been sent out, all the money had been spent. Now we have this young, upstart quasi-fundamentalist pastor standing on the rock of inerrancy and biblical complementarianism unwilling to budge battling it out with the mainline denominational quasi-liberal riding the waves of postmodern hermeneutics and egalitarianism (though after more and more of these emails, I am convinced he is just a plain ole liberal – and yes, he would say that I am just plain ole fundamentalist). Yikes. There would be confused parents, irritated parishioners, and arrogant nay-sayers. But, both of them are committed believers, committed to God’s Word, and committed to God’s vision for marriage revealed in the Word. Yet this little culture war being waged in the midst of their marriage preparation was very unsettling, to say the least.

In Loving Submission. . .part two

Here is an email I sent to the bride to be regarding the whole battle over words, gender roles, pastoral authority, and, well, their own marriage:

Dear Kelly,

I wanted to take a moment and try, perhaps feebly, to encourage you on a day that I am sure has been rather disheartening to you. In the midst of these “momentary troubles” (2 Cor. 4:17) we need to sit for a moment and capture the promise that they are indeed achieving some eternally weighty glory.

Weddings are important things. They are important because marriage is important. Marriage is important because God made it and called it good. God made it and called it good so that he would be honored and glorified in it. Paul tells us that marriage profoundly and mysteriously points us to the relationship of Jesus and his people. And so we look at how Jesus loves and leads his people, and we tell husbands to imitate him as he loves and leads his wife. Then we tell our children, our neighbors, our brothers and sisters to look upon godly husbands and remember Jesus’ love for us. We look at how the Church is to submit to her Savior’s headship, obedient to his gracious care, and we tell wives to imitate the Church as she submits and follows her husband. Then we tell our children, our neighbors, our brothers and sisters to look upon godly wives and remember that God is in charge, that he opposes the proud and exalts the humble, that his power is manifested in our weakness. In this, somehow (it is a profound mystery!) God’s plan to exalt himself in the death and resurrection of his Son, to redeem humanity, to restore fallen-ness with Spirit led sanctification is painted for us in marriage.

The thing is, Satan hates that picture. The World hates that picture. Our flesh hates that picture. Satan will spread lies about marriage, he will say things like, “Has God really said?” Or, “well, you and I, and all those who really understand the Bible know that the Apostle Paul didn’t really mean what it most certainly looks like he said.” The World will say, “Don’t make issues about words” or “people will be confused” or “this all sounds so archaic and intolerant” or this, or that. Our flesh says, “I want a pretty wedding”, or “I can’t go through this fight right now”, or “I don’t want to look stupid”, or “can’t we just fudge here so that things will go smoothly?”. [Realize, Kelly, I’m not accusing you of these statements…they have all bounced around in my head!] And all this wages war with the Spirit and seeks to stand in the straight path as we walk in the Spirit.

Your whole marriage will be a fight against the world, the flesh, and the devil. For some reason, God has given you a skirmish to deal with here in the last two months before you get married. I believe that God wants to bless you in this. You’re getting a glimpse of some really powerful spiritual struggles going on in our churches and in our culture. In some ways, it shouldn’t surprise us, especially at such an important time in your life and in such an important worship event as your wedding service. The glorious thing is, as God promises to illustrate profound mysteries in your submission to Josh and in his love and leadership of you; so will God illustrate these mysteries in your fight to honor His Word and design in your marriage ceremony.

And so, I will do whatever it takes as your pastor to make this ceremony something that honors God and brings you joy! Don’t let the sin of others, the strategies of Satan, the clamor of the world, or the weakness of the flesh rob you of the joy of honoring God with your marriage. That goes for today, and for every day God gives you and Josh together.

Believing an Eternal Glory will Come from this Momentary Trouble,

Pastor Erik

In Loving Submission. . . part three

And what happened?

That is the great part. I called a PCA church around the corner from this Methodist Church that I knew might be sympathetic. They were ready and willing to help, and offered us the use of their church if we were left without a place to have this service! It turns out that an associate pastor of this PCA church actually lives next door to the bride's parents! Though the parents were a bit bothered at first by my unwillingness to fudge a bit on the word 'submission', they soon came around as they considered Scripture and the nature of this whole situation. It turns out we will be using this other church, and everything is ok.

I wanted to share the emails that Josh and Kelly sent to me (and Paul Gilbert, a Four Oaks pastor doing their premarital counseling).


OK, my mom and dad are in. Mainly because [they] read what God's PERFECT word said this morning about submission and she would be in agreement with us, and wants our vows to reflect God and to glorify and honor Him.

Your email meant a lot to me yesterday and helped put things once again into perspective. There was a HUGE battle going on yesterday within me, so it is funny because all the statements you made were lies flooding my brain. So to be reminded that things like this will happen especially in light of such a special time makes sense and keeps me from dwelling and eventually believing those lies.

This whole situation is becoming funny to me, and exciting because I just have no idea what is going to happen. I truly appreciate your help in everything and it is actually a great sense of relief because now we have freedom in what we want to say before our Father, family and friends!

In Christ,
Kelly


We have been so blessed these last 24 hours as we have seen friends, family and OUR church rally around us in their love, support and prayers! We quickly realized yesterday that this situation was so much BIGGER than "changing a word." We know that to stand on the slippery slope of changing words can only lead to disaster! Though [the pastor of the church in question], informed Kelly and I that he feels we have an "unhealthy view of marriage" (guess you are not doing your job Paul!), I believe that God has used and will use this trial to stenghthen our marriage in so many ways. I believe we are seeing Ephesians 5 played out in a VERY tangible and real way!
As I walked Kelly to her door last night, she told me it meant so much to her that I loved her so well through the day as I held her (numerous times) in my arms to cry, as I was patient with her and her parents, and as I even made the phone call the Pastor on her behalf -- she felt my intense love for her yesterday! And on the other side of that I told her how I felt that we had been thrown onto a "battlefield of truth" and as I made the decision to take I stand on what I believe to be TRUE of the Word of God and Christian marriage and not compromise, I looked to my side and there Kelly stood..."submitting" to my decision, even though the easy road was an option!
This is why we can TOGETHER say "Praise God -- He is good in all things!" So, again I just wanted to say thanks to both of you for your prayers and standing firmly with us in this. Paul asked us yesterday how the church could encourage us and come along side of us (in general)...well, I would say you are doing and have done that well. Thank you...

Bound to His Word

Josh and Kelly

Why blog on all this? First, to remind you of the battle that is being fought in every corner over the truth of God's Word. Secondly, to remind you of the battle that is being waged against the design of God for the roles of men and women in marriage. And thirdly, to remind you that God will bless you and provide for you as you stand upon the truth of His Word and hold fast to its teaching regarding ALL of life.

On Manliness in a Feminized Culture...

I was done with my sermon and caught the tail end of an interview with Harvey Mansfield, professor of Government at HAH-vahd (if your from BAHstahn) on his recent book, Manliness. Prof. Mansfield was being grilled by none other than the paragon of feminist virtue, Naomi Wolf. She poked and prodded, scoffed and cajoled, but her subject seemed unflappable. He seemed, well, 'manly', I suppose.

Here is the description of Harvey Mansfield given by Gwen Ifill of the PBS Online Newshour:
Harvey Mansfield came to Harvard 50 years ago as a freshman and never left. As a professor of government he's made a name for himself as an expert on de Tocqueville and Machiavelli. But he is also deeply involved in shaping modern conservative political thought. He has had the ear of Presidents Ford, Reagan and Bush, and from his perch at Harvard he has often been at the center of campus debate, arguing against affirmative action, multiculturalism, feminism and academic grade inflation.

I'm sure that Ms. Ifill gave those credentials with a smirk and a roll of the eyes. But he sounds worth listening to in my book.

I commend an interesting article from The American Enterprise by Prof. Mansfield regarding manliness in our culture: http://www.taemag.com/issues/articleid.17576/article_detail.asp

Ben Stein has a great article on Men and Cars in the same issue. I drive a '97 Isuzu Oasis minivan. Fully loaded. (2 car seats, dual window shades, 4 sippee cup holders, action figures and strange little pink haired ponies strewn about the floorboards). It takes a REAL MAN to drive that thing with pride baby!

Mothers, who's your daddy...

...this decaying culture or our Heavenly Father? The winds of our culture, so cruel indeed to mothers and children, are dashing biblical motherhood against the rocks of our own greed and self absorbtion.
Pastor Tim Bayly's blog points us to this great article in the Guardian. Check it out http://www.guardian.co.uk/Columnists/Column/0,,1725350,00.html, and check out BaylyBlog as well http://timbayly.worldmagblog.com/timbayly/.

The Gender War and the Call of Christ

We can admit, readily, and with great sadness, that there has been much oppression and abuse of women throughout the centuries. And a great deal of this has been in done under the banner of the church and with the claim of biblical authority. It is the duty of the church, and Christians filled with the Spirit and under the authority of the whole counsel of God’s will to fight vehemently against such attempts and oppression, and any and all abuses against women in our homes, churches, and communities.

But in fighting against oppression and abuse with the power of God’s word and the love of Christ, we must certainly not abandon the clear teaching of God’s Word regarding the roles of men and women, and the biblical complement that they offer one another toward the building of the home, the church, healthy community, and the propagation of the good news of Jesus Christ.

Since the 1960’s there has been a direct assault on the biblical portrait of manhood and womanhood, and of the biblical institution of marriage. This assault has come mainly from social and gender feminism, and abides today. Sadly, this so-called feminism has crept into the church itself and is redefining the biblical calling of the home, the biblical call of male authority and leadership in the church, and is even redefining a biblical theology of the fatherhood of God. Under specific attack has always been the calling in a woman’s life to the role of nurturer and caregiver in a family through the vocation of motherhood:

In 1962, Betty Friedan boldly wrote an article and Ladies Home Journal boldly published it. The article for the ‘home journal’ was ironically titled, “Housewife is NOT a profession”. This was a prelude to her classic work of women’s liberation, “The Feminine Mystique” which called for the end of “domestic slavery” where wives are held in “comfortable concentration camps”. With colleagues such as Germaine Greer, author of “The Female Eunuch”, the women’s liberation movement sought to end the destructive bondage of the traditional family. Liberating women through abortion on demand, the advocacy of divorce, and a strong call for government funded childcare, so that women are not shackled to the home and the needs of children and are able to better find themselves in the world.

We have found though, that women on the whole have lashed back at such radical claims and goals. Through the 80’s and 90’s women began to see the emptiness of the world’s portrait of value being measured by some outside vocational reputation or corporate success. They have returned and are returning to the home, a place of nobility and value, where children can be nurtured and raised. In the 80’s, Friedan recanted much of her earlier rantings, and affirmed the lofty calling of motherhood in her book “The Second Stage”. Germaine Greer, previously the radical of “The Female Eunuch”, authored “The Whole Woman” and said this: “I mourn for my unborn babies. I still have pregnancy dreams, waiting with vast joy and confidence for something that will never happen. In the “Female Eunuch” I argued that motherhood should not be treated as a substitute career: now I would argue that motherhood should be regarded as a genuine career option” she goes on to affirm the “immense rewardingness of children is the best kept secret in the western world”. And yet, it hasn’t been a secret, and shouldn’t be to those who know God’s Word.

One of the main reasons for our recent series on Manhood and Womanhood has been to reveal the ‘secrets’ of God’s Word, as the church is called to do. The revelation of these secrets is called, in the New Testament, ‘proclamation’ or ‘preaching’ or ‘bearing witness’. Let’s bear witness to the truth of God’s Word as it touches with grace and mercy every area of our lives. Let’s proclaim with joy the gospel of Jesus that liberates us from sin. Let’s instill in one another a great vision for what God can do in and through us as we seek to be his children, man and woman alike. In these things, are we not more than conquerors? Then why stand ashamed of the whole counsel of God’s Word in the face of a dying world and collapsing culture? Let's answer the call of Christ to be salt and light in a dark world.

Some Quotes on Manhood and Womanhood

“What I have to say is not validated by my having a graduate degree or a position on the faculty or administration of an institution of higher learning. It comes not from any set of personal tastes and preferences. It is not a deduction from my own genetic leanings or temperament. Instead, it is what I see as the arrangement of the universe and the full harmony and tone of Scripture. This arrangement is a glorious hierarchical order of graduated splendor, beginning with the Trinity, descending through seraphim, cherubim, archangels, angels, men, and all lesser creatures, a mighty universal dance, choreographed for the perfection and fulfillment of each participant.”
- Elizabeth Eliot

“Tell me what the world is saying today and I’ll tell you what the church will be saying seven years from now.”
-Francis Schaeffer

We should find in Christianity and the Church “an element that unbelievers will call irrational and believers will call supra-rational. There ought to be something in it opaque to our reason though not contrary to it…if we abandon that, if we retain only what can be justified by standards of prudence and convenience at the bar of enlightened common sense, then we exchange revelation for that old wraith Natural Religion.”
-C.S. Lewis

“One day I was privileged to sit at the table next to Mother Teresa of Calcutta. I had long admired her and her work with the destitute and dying in Calcutta and throughout the world. The Capitol Hill luncheon in her honor was held in the ornately decorated Senate caucus room in the Russell Building. As she entered, she seemed dwarfed by the enormity of the room. She was even tinier than I had expected. As she walked into the room, clad in a simple blue and white habit, I saw some of the strongest leaders in the world rise to their feet and applaud her with tears in their eyes. They were honored simply to be in her presence. Here was a woman who obviously had tremendous power. She possessed more power than those who walked the marble halls of Congress. She had more power than I had seen in this city of power. “How has she done thing?” I asked myself. She owned nothing, never shook her fist in anger for her rights, and never asked for anything for herself. Instead, she had reached down into the gutter and raised up and loved those the world calls unlovable. And she had done it simply because the poor were created by the God she loves and serves.”
-Dee Jepsen

“Lucille Ball was the first lady of American comedy. Some time before her death she did a remarkable television interview with Merv Griffin, who asked her a very pointed and serious question. “Lucille, you’ve lived a long time on this earth and you are a wise person. What’s happened to our country? What’s wrong with our children? Why are our families falling apart? What’s missing?”
Lucy’s startling yet matter of fact reply came quickly. “Papa’s missing.,” she said.
“Things are falling apart because Papa’s gone. If Papa were here, he would fix it.”
-Weldon Hardenbrook

“The notion of responsibility is at the crux of true fatherhood. The conscious sense of responsibility for the physical and spiritual well being of others is the mark of a true father.”
-Clayton Barbeau

From the beginning of the Industrial revolution, “The groundwork for the 20th century fatherless home was set. By the end of the 19th century for first time it was socially and morally acceptable for men not to be involved with their families.”
-Lawrence Fuchs

“Homemaking is not employment for slothful, unimaginative, incapable women. It has as much challenge and opportunity, success and failure, growth and expansion, perks and incentives, as any corporate career.”
-Dorothy Morrison

“No one can, without renouncing the world, in the most literal sense, observe my method; and there are few, if any, that would entirely devote above twenty years of the prime of life in hopes to save the souls of their children, which they think may be saved without so much ado; for that was my principal intention, however unskillfully and unsuccessfully managed.”
- Susanna Wesley

“Every one is in favor of equal pay, but no one is in favor of doing the dishes.”
-Mary Jo Bane, Wellesley Women’s Research Center

“My career has suffered because of the children and the children have suffered because of my career. I’ve been torn and haven’t been able to function fully in either arena. I don’t know one person who does both successfully, and I know a lot of working mothers.”
- Joanne Woodward

“We have discovered that many of our problems—in children’s and young people’s behavior, in our morals, culture and in production—are partially caused by the weakening of family ties and slack attitude to family responsibilities. This is a paradoxical result of our sincere desire to make women equal with men in everything.” (He added that Russia was looking for ways for women to return “to their purely womanly mission”.)
-Mikhail Gorbechev

Sometimes feminists remind me of little girls standing beneath a boys’ tree hut. Forbidden to enter because they were girls, some of them vowed in their childish hearts that one day they would force their way into that tree hut. Others vowed that when they grew up they would cut down the tree; if they couldn’t play, no one could. Still others became determined that they would never again allow anyone to call them girls. I have to admit that I have been spared this envy because when I was young, I had talked my way into the boys’ tree hut and discovered that nothing all that exciting was happening there.
-Dale O’Leary

It is no accident that the meaning of being a man or being a woman has been radically transformed in a society that celebrates freedom and equality, encourages individualism and autonomy, rejects tradition, practices contraception and abortion, sees marriage as a lifestyle, provides the same education and promotes the same careers for men and
women, homogenizes fathers and mothers in the neutered work of “parenting,” denies vulnerability and dependence, keeps morality out of sight, and raises its children without any sense of duty or obligation to future generations.
- Amy Kass

To be Queen Elizabeth within a definite area, deciding sales, banquets,
labors, and holidays; to be Whitely within a certain area, providing toys, boots, cakes, and books; to be Aristotle within a certain area, teaching morals, manners, theology, and hygiene; I can understand how this might exhaust the mind, but I cannot imagine how it could narrow it. How can it be a large career to tell other people’s children about the Rule of Three, and a small career to tell one’s own children about the universe? How can it be broad to be the same thing to everyone and narrow to be everything to someone? No, a woman’s function is laborious, but because it is gigantic, not because it is minute.
- G. K. Chesterton

One of the ways I help couples get a handle on leadership is to ask, “Who says, ‘let’s’ more often? The man or the woman?” The man ought to say ‘let’s’ more often: “Let’s talk about the kids, let’s have a state-of our marriage discussion, let’s work on our finances, let’s get things in order in the home, let’s take care of our yard better, let’s consider getting a new car.” If the woman is constantly going to her husband and saying,
“Let’s, let’s, let’s. . . .” and he’s always dragging his feet, not taking the initiative, she’s going to be a very frustrated woman. She should not have to be the one who says ‘let’s.’ The man should be.

I asked Noel at the beginning of our marriage and haveasked her periodically over the last thirty years, “Do you operate happily on the principle that I am generally
the initiative taker in this family? And if we cannot agree on an issue, even after many hours of conversation, will you submit to my judgment?” And she has
said, “Yes.” Now that does not mean that I always invoke that privilege. But it’s crucial that she give it. That’s what submission is. And a good husband, a
good leader, a good lover will often say, “I don’t think we should re-do the bathroom now,” or “I’m not sure we should adopt a child now, but I see where your heart is, and I love to see you flourish. I want to honor your desires, and I believe God is sovereign and will work things out. And for your sake and for your joy, I yield to your choice.” She would have gone either way. She would have let me have it, or she would be happy
to hear me give her this choice. That’s not an abdication of leadership. That’s a servant way of handling leadership. And it’s based on the principle of submission, where she says, “You call the shot, and I’ll be happy with whatever you decide.”
- John Piper