God's Word has a lot to say about gossip. Consider the Proverbs:
Proverbs 11:13 A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy man keeps a secret.
Proverbs 16:28 A perverse man stirs up dissension, and a gossip separates close friends.
Proverbs 20:19 A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid a man who talks too much.
Proverbs 26:20 Without wood a fire goes out; without gossip a quarrel dies down.
Proverbs 26:21 As coals are to burning coals, and wood to fire; so is a contentious man to kindle strife.
Or God's Law:
Leviticus 19:16 "'Do not go about spreading slander among your people. "'Do not do anything that endangers your neighbor's life. I am the LORD.
Or Jesus:
Mark 7:21 For from within, out of men's hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, 22 greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly.
Or Paul:
2 Corinthians 12:20 For I am afraid that when I come I may not find you as I want you to be, and you may not find me as you want me to be. I fear that there may be quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, factions, slander, gossip, arrogance and disorder.
Titus 3:1 Remind the people to be subject to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready to do whatever is good, 2 to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and to show true humility toward all men.
1 Timothy 5:13 Besides, they get into the habit of being idle and going about from house to house. And not only do they become idlers, but also gossips and busybodies, saying things they ought not to.
Or James:
James 4:11 Brothers, do not slander one another. Anyone who speaks against his brother or judges him speaks against the law and judges it. When you judge the law, you are not keeping it, but sitting in judgment on it.
Or Peter:
1 Peter 2:1 Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice and all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind. 2 Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation
There are many words in Scripture used to describe this sort of 'wicked speech' against one another: talebearer, mumbler, whisperer, slanderer, evil-speaker, reviler, blasphemer, babbler.
Gossiping is destructive for at least 10 reasons:
1. It is hatred toward God who created all men in his image and for his glory.
2. It is hatred toward God who redeemed his people and loves them with a steadfast love.
3. It is a hatred toward Christ who gave his life for his people, and who himself loved all men, especially those who reviled him- not reviling in return.
4. It is hatred toward the Spirit who lives in us and seeks to bear fruit and is grieved by our evil speech; it is hatred toward the Spirit who lives in our brothers and brings fellowship and is grieved by our divisive words and desires.
5. It is hatred toward men who bear God's image and deserve our respect, kindness, and love.
6. It is hatred toward our brothers and sisters in Christ, who are part of our very family deserving our protection and love.
7. It brings strife, division, and chaos in the body of Christ.
8. It plants seeds of doubt, discouragement, disloyalty.
9. It is an attack of Satan against those called to lead and maintain godly authority.
10. It is an attack against the Church and the Kingdom of God.
How should we protect our own hearts and tongues from this great evil? How should we protect the reputation and dignity of our brothers and sisters when malign and blasphemed? How should we handle those who come with wagging tongues against our siblings in the household of God?
I have the rare privilege of having my parents, my parents in law, my older brother and his family, my younger brother and his family, and my younger sister all living in the same town and all worshipping with us at Four Oaks. Yes, this presents challenges, but by and large it is a tremendous blessing and joy to me to have my family around me in ministry. I want to use my relationships with my family as a picture of the way we should handle slander in the family of God.
No one knows the warts and flaws of my brothers and sisters like me. No one knows my sins and failures like my brothers and sisters. If anyone has the goods on me it is them. But their love for me is fierce, as mine is for them. It isn't blind, and it doesn't passively accept all these faults. But this love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8); it bears all things and believes all things (for their good, doubting first the bad report). My love for them will not allow me to hear a hurtful word without protecting their name, because it is my own. My love for them will not allow me to accept a report without first coming to them for their side. My love for them causes me to bear trivial accusations or mocking sentiment against them in silence without burdening their hearts with petty concerns and harsh words.
You want to see Erik the fierce? Just try and speak some evil against my little sister. You can be
assured that there will be an unequivocal smackdown in every sense of the term if you wag your tongue against one of my brothers. It is not because I am a fool who cannot bear to hear the truth about them (as I said, very little anyone could say could surprise me). I desire that my siblings be conformed to Christ and turn from actual sins or flaws in character. But gossip never accomplishes this. The context for our growth in Christ is through
the 'one anothers' of the New Testament lived out in the house of God, not through cowardly whispers and proud mumblings.
The next time you hear someone sharing a tasty morsel of gossip against another believer, remember that they are speaking against your own brother. The next time you hear someone bad mouthing the preacher or the worship pastor, remember that they are talking about your Dad- he's not perfect, but he's your dad. If we truly lived as a family together, and believed that we are brothers and sisters, mothers and fathers in the household of God, we would be far less eager to speak against each other.
This happens more often than I'd like to think: someone has a word of judgment or criticism against me as a pastor. Little do they know one of my siblings is within earshot. But, the spiritual reality is- many of my siblings are within earshot. The problem is that we have either grown too accustomed with our hard and wicked words, or too unacquainted with our family to care.
So when you are about to whisper a word of dissent and contention against Joe Smith, remember you're talking to Joe's sister. When you lean in to hear the story of Jane Smith's recent struggle, remember that Jane is your little sister. Close your mumbling lips and bear the contention between your brother quietly and privately. Rear up with fierce and righteous indignation against the slander of your dear sister and stop the wagging tongue.
In this way we will begin to learn 'how people ought to conduct themselves in God's house, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and support of the truth'.
Labels: bible study, Body Life